Why you shouldn't hire me

About a year ago I posted a blog on the nine or so reasons a person would NOT want to hire me. I wanted to repost it because it was one of my faves.  Well don't you know when I redesigned my site I lost that post…all of it.  It's never to be seen again.  Just floating out in the cyber worlds.  Sad really.  I should think about writing these things down.  Do you ever write things on paper anymore? I'm a real pen and paper kinda gal so I can't believe I don't keep a backup of any sort?! 

Anyway, I digress.  I've decided my clever post about hiring and not hiring me needed an update anyway.  So I'll start from scratch with only 5 reasons this time. 

Top 5 Reasons NOT to Hire Me

1.  You love themed sessions with lemonade stands or live animals that don't really belong to your family.  I don't use pretty backdrops or do themed sessions. It's not that I don't like them. I do actually. I'm envious of the people that are able to do those sessions well. I've tried them in the past, and it wasn't pretty; but not because I don't know how to take a good themed photo.  You see it's simply because my heart isn't in it.  And unfortunately when your heart isn't in whatever it is you're doing, it's blaringly obvious in your work.  It's flat and uninspired and kind of just sad really. My passion, my love,  and my inspiration lies in the "day to day."  The moments in time we take for granted.  The places you live, things your family does for fun, and the blanket your son won't sleep without.  Going into each session without a concrete plan puts a song in my heart!  So if that type of thing gives you incurable anxiety OR you really want those adorable  Valentine themed pictures of your child in a wagon with hearts hanging everywhere - you probably shouldn't hire me. 

 

2.  You found a picture on Pinterest you love and want me to do the same thing.  I'm sorry, but I won't recreate the exact picture you've pinned on Pinterest. And in my opinion nobody should. I might be slightly silly but I do take my profession seriously.  Copying another persons photograph is the equivalent of tracing another artists drawing and passing it off as your original work.  I'm not saying I don't gather inspiration from Pinterest and other places.  I certainly do! But they are inspiration.  Sources to spark NEW ideas.  If you find a picture you love on Pinterest, let's talk about why you love it.  And I promise I will create a picture that gives you the same feeling or reaction without being a carbon copy.   But...if you find a picture and want someone to replicate it entirely - don't hire me....please.  You'll be disappointed and that's not good for either of us. 

3. I don't have a studio.  See number 1 above ^^.  All those same reasons apply. The truth is, there are times I'd love to have a studio and it would make my life easier.  People would come to me.  I could book more clients each day.  I could save gas money. People think having a studio makes you a "legit" business so it would help me appear more credible. Some people are a little nervous to have me in their homes so they don't bother booking me at all. So maybe I SHOULD get a studio!!?? Yes yes great idea. But in order to do my work in the candid style I am committed to, I'd need a very LARGE building.  And that my friends costs a lot of money. ALOT!  And guess who has to pay for it???  My clients do.  I consider myself fairly priced. If I have a $2500 lease payment every month, utilities, etc. my session fees have to increase to cover those costs.  And at this point I'm just not comfortable with that.

 

4. You really love photos where everyone is posed nicely while looking and smiling at the camera. I can appreciate why anyone would want that.  I really can.  Several people I know want that from their portrait experience. By now you probably have a solid understanding of my passion for capturing real life.  So tell me - if I were to walk into your home tonight just after dinner, would I find your family dressed to the nines, sitting perfectly on the couch, looking directly at me, and smiling from ear to ear???  If I do I will probably turn and  run out the front door screaming  because that my friends would be CREEPY! Haha! Listen I'm not saying your traditionally posed family pictures are creepy.  I'm just saying they aren't real and they aren't me. There are a number of great photographers in our state that can get that for you.  I'm just not one of them. So...you guessed it - if this is what you want you won't want to hire me. 

5. You believe that credible photographers should be very serious "all business" people who come prepared with a shot and pose list. **sigh** I used to try really hard to be like everyone else.  But, in the wise words of Popeye the Sailor Man, "I ams what I ams."  I love what I do and I like to have fun. I'll often laugh at the wrong times and encourage mischievous behavior from the people I work with, no matter their age. I get a serious kick out of kids and the things they say or do.  And even when I know I shouldn't smile or giggle at something they say I just can't help myself.  I tell jokes that only I think are funny, make silly noises with my mouth while I'm thinking, and often try new things on the fly. If any or all of these things make you uncomfortable you probably shouldn't hire me. 

If any of these things sound like you, I'm not criticizing.  In fact if you contact me I can refer you to some very skilled photographers who can deliver exactly what you're looking for.  I'm simply saying you won't be happy with me. If you've read this and still think you're interested, call me! I'd love to work with you. I will show up with a slightly shaky plan and a smile on my face!